my conclusion, however, is that i wouldn’t change anything drastically. As fleeting as life is i know that what i am doing now is the right thing. Being a Christian, i look to Jesus as an example of how to live life and He changed the world in 3 years. He knew he only had 3 years in which to do it but he seemed to be in no rush. He went to dinner parties and weddings and went fishing with friends. He only did what God told him to do.

I know that i now do what God wants me to do and so i am happy to do that. I think that if the threat of death will change the way you live your life to make you “better” but that the prospect of living to 90 won’t inspire you to change your life then you need to look at your motivation for doing what you do, your motivation for living.

Ricky

@chip yup, reminds me of a quote from one of my fave economists Paul Romer: “A crisis is a terrible thing to waste”.
Thank goodness (retrospectively!) for things that bump us out off our predictable trajectory..

“The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

“… if we need some irreversible nudge off into the shrubbery …”

Sometimes disaster is your best friend. If it hadn’t been for irreconcilable differences at the company where I worked before, I might never have had the courage to strike out on my own. I don’t even want to think about how I might still have been punching the clock for someone else.

the thing about dreams are that they are windows to the future. how we live our lives relates to how we dream. being positive and expecting the best from people will lead to technicolor, amazing dreams filled with love, hope and trust. I havent had a nightmare in 15 years and I can only account for it in the way I love the world. If you are dreaming about change then its there for you to take, but you need to make the decisions to shift your reality towards that dream if its far off your current path.

I have made a few quick significant changes of direction, if you want to call it that, in my life. I gave up a growing business (well sold it actually), travelled for a year without a plan or a companion, constantly waking up and deciding which direction to go in today. I moved to Cape Town the day after I wanted to come, quit and started here fresh with nothing. Once you have done it over and over, its not so hard. Also, I find that when you have nothing, the small things count the most.

The problem is leaving people behind and hurting people who rely on you to live your life the way you currently live it, because it suits their reality and what they can get from you. Sometimes to be true to yourself in spite of disappointing others is the best thing, even if its the hardest thing. To be true in spite of causing hurt, thats the weally weally big world.

I could go on and on but this isnt the time or the place, even though I love this topic.

Thank you. Your writing has really affected my world in a great way today. Raoul

@Chip [hooray!! so good to be reminded of how much I enjoy your writing - with you on the Jonestown post.] I agree, and it’s that incremental layering that compounds & before you know it, it’s too damn heavy to move other than a few feet of our worn-in paths. This just came to mind from Buckley:

“As idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the cost becomes prohibitive”

So that’s why I have my doubts about whether we can just decide to leap one morning, or if we need some irreversible nudge off into the shrubbery to make our way back to what feels most alive.

Rock on, legendary lady.